Current Listen: Love and Some Verses courtesy of Iron & Wine
The darkest night of the month. The stars spatter against the black velvet backdrop, finally getting a chance to shine on their own. They shimmer, some bright white, others the palest of gold, and every so often, the "rainbow star," changing from red to blue to green. Heaven's tiny strobe lights.
Some claim the new moon phase plays havoc with their moods, being a galactic tease. I believe this to be true. There must be an illogical reason why yesterday I was on top of the world -- happy, energetic with a force field of positive karma surrounding me, and this morning when I woke I felt like Superman lying on a bed of Kryptonite. I waxed melancholy most of the day, letting darts laced with self-doubt prick me. By nightfall, the list was much longer than the number of bullets I owned.
My "well of creativity" echoed when I called down for reinforcements. Even editing sucked, not doing it, but what was coming out into my story. Yesterday I left my beta reader with a cliff hanger. Today she waited for the next chapter. Finally late afternoon she emailed me. You left me hanging in the middle of a wedding between Heaven and Hell with a large rock flying somewhere inside the church. Hel-lo? The rock knocked the author out. I read what I wrote and thought "yeah right. Like that's believable." Tonight, I'm searching for my white flag. Surrender makes the most sense right now.
But as most authors know, there are many voices inside our heads. One voice yells above the others.
"Hey you! Lady moping around feeling sorry for yourself."
I look around for someone matching the description and find my reflection staring back from the black window pane. Surely the voice is wrong.
"No, I'm not wrong. It's you. What's with the attitude all of a sudden?"
"I do not have attitude. I'm having an off day, that's all. It's the new moon screwing with me," I say.
"That's a myth. An excuse. Tell yourself you can't do something and you won't. But remind yourself how awesome you are, list all the good things you do and have, then read your favorite chapter. See? You're a kick-ass writer and letting someone tell you otherwise, especially yourself is NOT tolerated. Got that?"
The "voice" is right. I'm my own worst enemy and indulging in self destructive thinking was blocking me. So what do you do when the scene looks hopeless, whether in your story or your life? You step back and look at the scene through a different point of view. Another character, or voice that sees a different angle.
The new moon hides once a month to allow the stars center stage. Yes, there's a void where the silver orb usually hangs, but you don't see it. The stars of the show are performing, hiding the black hole and letting us see the universe from a different perspective for a couple of nights. Without the moon, Heaven's tiny luminaries get a chance to prove what they can do.
So it is with us. Life happens, leaving voids or holes in our lives and hearts. But if we take a step away from the black holes and see all the little things happening around the edges, soon we no longer see the hole...no longer sense the void. Whatever was there is gone, sometimes only for a moment and sometimes forever, but when we allow the small subtleties we've ignored to take center stage, we adapt and grow to love and appreciate the little blessings we took for granted.
Relish the new moon phase. Look at it as an opportunity to see another view of the universe.
What does the new moon do to you? Inspire your imagination or transform you from beauty to beast?
Thanks for stopping by and filling a "void." Harley Brooks - Joelene's inspiration
Today's thought: Life is what happens when we're making other plans.
5 comments:
Well, let's see. The moon usually inspires me. But, I do get more emotional around that time too. Today's been an off day for me also, I felt a little down...I've come to terms with these days though (or at least I think I have) I give myself the day off from writing, and definitely editing. I'd botch anything I touched when I'm like this.
So, today I did my second love, I changed the furniture around a little, re-decorated a couple of areas. That seems to give me a deep satisfaction. I'll look at the writing tomorrow. After all, it's another day. Gee, I sound so Scarlett!:)
Lo
Hmmm Good question Joelene. I always pay attention to the Full Moon. It inspires me, drives me and I can't seem to go to bed without looking at the big fat ball of light. (Not nearly as dramatic as your description, but I'm still on cuppa #1). I'll have to pay attention next time to the New Moon and see if it affects me. I know it just happened, but what day and what did I do that particular day? Too far back to remember these days. Love this post! Hate that know it all voice! lol
To my knowledge it has no affect at all on me. I didn't even know there was a new moon, but I too will pay closer attention the next time and see if I notice any changes. I hope not. Other than hormones, I like to think I control my moods.
I don't sleep well during a full moon, but probably because of the brightness through the window. I do love looking at the beautiful glowing ball. I used to think I was in control of my moods, but that was before things "changed" in my life (get my drift...) Thanks friends!
I definitely think our moods follow the moon's phases. There are physical changes, too. My aunt, who worked as a nurse, said more babies are born during the full moon. Police say thee is more crime. And then there is the term, lunatics ...
Sandy B
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